The last couple of weeks have been a real struggle for me. Which I know I’ve mentioned once or twice.
For reasons I can’t get into on such a public forum, I am really not enjoying my 8to5 anymore. I used to take pride in my work, used to love my coworkers, used to find refuge in throwing myself into the job. But the recent changes have me dreading my hour+ commute every day, and doing everything I can just to survive the week until I get a couple of days off.
It’s bad. Really, REALLY bad. And I’m looking for something new but it’s not going as well as I had hoped it would.
I know something will come along eventually. It’s just so hard when I look back on my application history at certain places and see that I’ve been applying for positions with them since 2011. I feel like I’ll be stuck here forever.
On the one hand, okay, I’m fortunate that I still have my job and that I never went through the struggles of being laid off back when it seemed like everyone was out of work.
But on the other hand, when it gets to the point where you wish a meteor would hit the school so that you don’t have to go? Probably not the best situation for an already precarious mental state.
So I’m in survival mode right now. Because it’s really all I CAN do.
Outside of work, things are much better. Whatever is going on with my health is apparently not a big deal since my doctor never bothers to call me back. I’m assuming if it was something to worry about, she would have gotten in touch with me by now. So I’ll just keep being ridiculously tired. I mean, I’ve lasted this long, what’s another 50 years or so?
Chris continues to be awesome. I know he isn’t perfect, not by any means, but it seems like every day he shows just another example of how perfect he is for me. He really does balance me out. He tells me when I need to just let things go or have more of a backbone. And he makes me laugh every single day. I really don’t know if I could have gotten through the past month without him. Luckily, I didn’t have to find out.
Oh, and watching the premier of Bachelor in Paradise with him? His running commentary had me laughing harder than I think I ever have in my entire life ever.
Also, many thanks to all of you who reached out when my blog was broken. It was a stupid plug-in issue. I don’t even know which one to blame because they all seem to be working fine, but I learned a little more about the behind-the-scenes of blog ownership this week, which is never a bad thing. Knowledge is power, right?
Anyway, that’s a little bit of my week in a nutshell. Now that my blog is fixed, posting should resume it’s normal frequency. Fingers crossed!